not-safe-for-earth:

vagisodium:

regardsbree:

princesshodan:

grimyboy:

What would you do if u walked in on your dad deep throating a dildo?

show him how it’s really done

holy fuck is that person dead

that person is shopped

(via fluorescentparade)

crackedchassis:

Metatron is spinning in lazy circles in Naomi’s desk chair, trying to decide which Heaven he wants to study for the day, and the door to the White Room slams open. Messy brown hair, blue eyes, and a familiar scowl greet him. Marv frowns. “Castiel. You weren’t supposed to die this soon. Your story won’t be an interesting one.”

Marv is hauled out of the chair by the front of his sweater and shaken like a ragdoll. “My name is Jimmy Novak. I’m from Pontiac, Illinois, and I’m fucking sick of angels.”

(via kototyph)

longlivesherlock:

whorville:

whorville:

Which letter of the alphabet has the most water?

The C

I FUCKING GET IT NOW IT TOOK ME LIKE 20 MINS

(via slydigger)

doclecter:

that’s it. the rest of europe can go home. nothing can anything top this

(via soulforsam)

jardestiel:

sherlocked-inside-the-tardis:

nonothingatall:

jendabenda:

jinglepandas:

egobus:

modified-grrrl:

petition for dudes to shut the fuck up about makeup on women

petition for everyone to shut the fuck up about makeup on women

petition for everyone to shut the fuck up about makeup on anyone

petition for everyone to shut the fuck up.

petition to fuck everyone

stop it

(via thespermrag)

weazulgrl:

I just came back in from letting my dog out.

he didn’t want to come in so I kept trying different things to get him to come and finally he ran the opposite direction and tripped over a large branch and did this ungraceful flip and I exclaimed out loud “DAMMIT MOON MOON!”

and about five houses down someone is having an outdoor party around a bonfire and I hear someone from there exclaim back “WHO THE FUCK INVITED MOON MOON!”

(via mycuddlefish)